marriage – Tripts

New Bride…

I am not married and may be I won’t so may be I should not be the one writing about it. But, hey all you people reading it let’s assume it’s my opinion, may be insane thoughts so let’s just read it for fun. All what I am going to share here are my sheer observations as I already said I am not married.

Whenever a girl marries and comes to a new place do we really for one second thinks what kind of anxiety she must have gone through while leaving her own house and going to some strange place to live the rest of her life. Love or Arrange it does not matter the place will still be strange for that girl in the beginning. So, why is it that the expectations are set for the girl only.

Like she should be polite, she should behave, she should adhere to family values, in short she should be a real nice person and she is not allowed for a single second of bad temper, bad day or having mood swings, why because she is the “Ideal One” or “Adarsh Bahu” as they say. You start having problems with her but do you try to understand her for once. May be even she is feeling it hard to adjust in the new environment. Do we make her feel wanted and accepted.

We are immediately the judgemental ones. It is we who will decide how she should behave, and the most hypocritical thing that I see is you don’t seem anything wrong when your own daughter wears jeans but if your “Bahu” does it she is lacking “Sanskar”, this is just one example I quoted. Why I said this was when you yourself does not treat her like your own daughter why do you then expect her to treat you all like her parents.

I don’t approve such mindset as an individual. I don’t see a point in blaming your daughter in law always and talking ill about her when you have not once embraced her with genuineness. Well not everyone is like that, someone’s are really lucky enough to have parents in their in laws. Well I would only sum up here by saying that give your daughter in law all the love in world and see the magic.

Love and light to all

Tripts…

Marriage – Only Goal ???

“Marriage” it is your ultimate reality. You are born to get married. It’s not easy to live life alone. Especially if you are a girl, life will be hell for you. No, don’t get me wrong, these are not my words, this is the entire humanity thinks.

Recently something really strange happened with me. My mumma’s cousin’s husband, my so called “Mausaji” – Uncle (I elaborated the relation to tell that they are not my direct relative, still “Related”) So he came home to ask for my hand for his son. The son whom I have been calling Bhaiya my entire life and wait a minute tying “Rakhi” to him for some years (Rakhi is a sacred thread that a sister ties on her brothers hand – a bond of love).

And the amazing part was I was in Mumbai he already came and spoke to my mother and she agreed too, waiting for me to visit. Though ofcourse my father was against this alliance, and why my mum and Maasa did this because we both have crossed 40 and still not married, their big reason to worry. I was not angry with them but feeling sad for them that they have lost their sanity completely. I was shook by this incident, it took me a day to register this into my system than I accepted the fact that when it comes to parents you just have to let go.

But I was just thinking whole day today, if I do not get married what actually will happen. Is it end of the world. No no, am serious if someone has answer let me know while reading this. In my family everyone from my cousins to my brother are married and have kids too, only I am left. But when ever there is a social gathering people look at me with pity having a thought “What will she do with her life when she grows old”. This one question really cracks me, you are not sure whether you would be getting up alive in morning the next day and still you are worried of what you would be doing in old age.

Why can’t “Being Single” treated normal. And currently what is really bothering me is a thought of brother and sister getting married even if not connected by blood. Yes my maasa is not my real but his son is my “Rakhi Brother” or people have completely forgotten the ethics, morals and conscience or the desperation is taken all over. I understand making old people understand is a nutcase. But this thought creeps me marrying to someone you faught with as child, took advice, had friendly banters, and now suddenly you try look him as a husband, does this thought shivers anyone of you or is it just the result of my overrthinking.

Whatever it is, my only appeal to everyone is marriage is not the only goal to be achieved in life. If I do not have a husband or child I still can live my life happily not that I will end in depression. And moreover people should really value the relation they are making. Stop making Marriage a taboo. I am not against marriages, marry someone you are compatible with. May be someday I might also marry someone if I get someone or not – Big Deal!!!

With only one thought

Respect relations and value each and every relation you make.

Love and happiness

Tripts

What’s Your Age???

Hi, if you don’t mind what’s your age? Have you come across this line. Well if you ask me hel lot of time. And it’s not that I feel embarrassed to tell my age. It’s just that this question is irrelevant and more than irrelevant do you think people generally ask NO, they judge you later on. “still not married – WHY”, “Look at her age, and not matured at all”, “Why still single, don’t have a boyfriend”, and the list is long.

You know earlier when I started working in Delhi, I was very vocal about my age. Because in my head, it was like- Okay, so I am this age so?. Though I was complimented a lot of times that I look young than my age, felt good. But then as I landed Mumbai to work, I was really restless with people asking my age. Earlier here too I was open about it but then PEOPLE!!!

Firstly, they were astonished of me being in my 30’s, then still single, Not married and then living alone and a Virgin. I was fed up and didn’t wanted to answer this question because people seem to laugh at me and belittle me.

So this is the real world, where people are more concerned of you but mind you not your wellbeing. Infact few days back I met a guy in my hometown Jhansi for some event work as was sitting idle since long, and guess what, he too asked what’s your age and what amazes me is if you say you don’t want to tell they will still insist coz they develop some curiosity, why so???

I mean what is this hallabaloo of age? Why can’t you leave people the way they are. How does it matter if they start working at 60, how does it matter if they are filmy at the age of 30, how does it matter if they are not mateured at the age of 40. Till the time they are lively and living their life to the fullest and most importantly not hurting other fellow being, that is something that should matter. Hope I am making some sense. And yes to those who still want to know “What’s my age?”, Keep guessing 😂😂😂

Love to all people ❤️

Tripts!!!

Married? NO!!! Why??

Hmmm, big question🤪 Tough one to answer! More than an IAS question I guess. Since long I wanted to write something on this, however whenever I thought of writing I fall short of words. But today I thought of just scribbing whatever is there in my mind without thinking if my grammar is proper or my vocabulary is fabulous.

Marriage? What is marriage??? If we go by meaning it would be like something “A sacred institution where two souls compatible to each other meet” Blah Blah Blah… But in reality marriage is something that just happens when two individuals meet, and are destined to mingle into one entity. But what if there is someone who is 25 plus and not married. Now, is that a shameful act? Or is the filth and negativity in my head? I am a single individual, my friends of my age are married and some are even having kids. Now, the reasons could be many. Not necessarily depressive ones or may be. You can’t say! But my point is why this one is so relevant a question to ask a single individual, the most important one. Off lately I came across some of my old friends with whom I was not in touch since quite a long time, and guess what the first question they asked me “Hey, are you married? No, Why? To begin with, yes they all are happily married and well settled in life.

To answer let me first begin with a happy smile that NO there is no sad story but sometimes things just don’t happen. I do not have one perfect answer as to why I am still single. May be I was not suppose to marry, may be I am not the right individual that any guy would like to settle with, may be I have adjustment issues or may be it still is not the right time… May be, May be, May be… No answer! Now tell me if you meet me at some point in life and find me still single what answer should I give you.

Earlier I was not upset of not getting married. I was a strong individual but now I am getting weak, my friends who ask me why aren’t am married don’t fail to amaze me by even giving me advice to get married as it is the only BIG necessity in life. Sometimes I feel like hiding somewhere where no one knows me, but I know that is also not an option. If I was some big personality having crores in my account, may be still then some people atleast would shut themselves if not all because then I would be having loads of money to take care of and most importantly enough to shut people, but I don’t even have that much money. No am not feeling sorry for myself because not getting married was my personal choice, but looking at societal mindset I do feel sorry for my parents because even though they don’t say anything but I do know somewhere they wanted deep in their hearts how good it would be if their daughter was married like other’s.

Sometimes I wonder where is people’s compassion towards others. If I see someone not married or not having a baby, I do not ask this question because somewhere I know it would pinch them deep down, if not all may be some. But why they do not think before asking especially if they are married that their question might hurt the person the question is being directed to. People should definitely have COMPASSION towards their fellow beings, may be they generically ask and do not intend to hurt anyone but if at the age of 40 someone is not married there might be some reason which they might not want to answer and might feel embarrassed to even address this question. And then it becomes socially awkward for such people to come in public and embrace their own selves be their own true original self. And how funny it is that then you only ask “What happened, you are not you anymore”.

I know nothing will change, this will keep on going and it’s okay people of our parents age won’t change, there is whole generation which we need to cover so we can ignore but what for the people of our age, can’t they develop “Understanding”, “Love” and “Respect” for the people of their own age group. Why can’t you be accepting? This is one question that all of us needs to ask ourselves and then we might expect some positive change in society in coming times.

And remember as someone rightly said once “Singleness is not a sickness, a sin, or a problem. Single people are not broken and they do not need to be fixed”. Stop feeling pity for them and be happy with them and enjoy with them like you use to once when you were friends when you were young 😘

Am I right OR I am right😂🌸❤️

Tripts!!!