choice – Tripts

New Bride…

I am not married and may be I won’t so may be I should not be the one writing about it. But, hey all you people reading it let’s assume it’s my opinion, may be insane thoughts so let’s just read it for fun. All what I am going to share here are my sheer observations as I already said I am not married.

Whenever a girl marries and comes to a new place do we really for one second thinks what kind of anxiety she must have gone through while leaving her own house and going to some strange place to live the rest of her life. Love or Arrange it does not matter the place will still be strange for that girl in the beginning. So, why is it that the expectations are set for the girl only.

Like she should be polite, she should behave, she should adhere to family values, in short she should be a real nice person and she is not allowed for a single second of bad temper, bad day or having mood swings, why because she is the “Ideal One” or “Adarsh Bahu” as they say. You start having problems with her but do you try to understand her for once. May be even she is feeling it hard to adjust in the new environment. Do we make her feel wanted and accepted.

We are immediately the judgemental ones. It is we who will decide how she should behave, and the most hypocritical thing that I see is you don’t seem anything wrong when your own daughter wears jeans but if your “Bahu” does it she is lacking “Sanskar”, this is just one example I quoted. Why I said this was when you yourself does not treat her like your own daughter why do you then expect her to treat you all like her parents.

I don’t approve such mindset as an individual. I don’t see a point in blaming your daughter in law always and talking ill about her when you have not once embraced her with genuineness. Well not everyone is like that, someone’s are really lucky enough to have parents in their in laws. Well I would only sum up here by saying that give your daughter in law all the love in world and see the magic.

Love and light to all

Tripts…

Divorce… A stigma

Every now and then we hear someone or the other getting divorced. And the amazing part is we at once judges one of the individual in the circus of life called “Divorce”. No, really that’s the bitter truth and I am no less.

Recently, there is one incident that shook me mentally. 4 months back I was living in a p.g with 2 girls one of whom was divorced at the early age of her life. And as soon as I shifted there she opened up about the painful chapter of her life. Now the interesting part is she was exactly like me, same mood swings, same attitude, same temparents overall same individuals and as you all know that opposites attract so we couldn’t gel for long and eventually had a major fallout due to which I left that p.g but one thing that I didn’t mentioned here was that during our verbal spat I told her in anger “Because of this attitude of yours, you got divorced”, which is a very wrong thing to say though I immidiately apologised to her but she never forgave me though I tried a lot in my way to say sorry but she just didn’t wanted to see my face. And I believe she was right in her own space.

Though there is one thing that I never told her because that might create rift among 2 best friends. Her own friend who was the 3rd girl among us 3 days before that spat mentioned this to me in general conversation and due to which I used this line in our fight as it was in my mind. Though many times I felt like telling her friend who was really nice to me that no matter how worse she is you cannot be talking about her in a negative sense to anyone specially a third person who is an outsider in your life like me but I never said because no one likes to lisiten negative about themselves, this I have learnt from my past experiences so I refrain giving any kind of gyan to anyone.

However, point over here is not who is wrong and who is right and who said what, point is who gave us the right to judge an individual who has suffered that dark chapter in his or her life. We were not there when they were having their ups and downs. We were not living their journeys. We do not know what went wrong.

Always remember whenever Divorce happens it is the responsibility of both the individuals involved. We cannot and should not blame any one person. It might be a possibility that the person might have tried a lot to save her or his marriage but eventually things couldn’t work for them. So in this case if a person ever tells you about his or her divorce story just give them a tight hug and say “You are stronger than this, this shall too pass”. Never judge them and please never ever think that it is their fault that they got divorced. May be god has better plans for them. I wish each one of them who ever has to go through this pain be strong and have a wonderful life ahead and lastly “To that special someone who once started with me as a strong friendship a big “SORRY” and I mean it.”

Lots of love to all

Tripts

Social Media Ideals

I know the title seems too wierd. What I meant here is that people posts too idealistic quotes on social media, but do they really mean it. No, trust me I know such people, infact public figures who posts too idealistic quotes like being positive, genuine soul etc etc but in reality they are exact opposite to it.

I never post such things on social media because our mind works in mysterious manner. Today we are positive, tomorrow we can be negative and the other day might get involve in immoral activities, we cannot predict our personality, it keep on changing. First of all develop humanity. Be kind to everyone. We all lack this virtue including me. I don’t think I am a genuine soul, if for once you became jealous of someone, made fun of someone’s appearance or spoke ill about someone then you are human not genuine. And that is why giving motivational gyan on social media is far from being true. They post to gain followers, more and more likes. I have worked in media industry and know many such people who are completely different off screen. And that’s not wrong but why to be saints on social media. Be who you are. I don’t feel ashamed saying that I am fake at times, negative and jealous being. Because I am human. One should be kind from inside and then they won’t have to give gyan to others and they will automatically have millions of followers.

Love

Tripts❤️

Slangs… Just words or disrespect!!!

As far as slangs used in English language as a part of conversation it’s all cool. However, I never like when people used ethnicity based slurs to define people. It is all in bad taste, very disrespectful! But for people it’s all in humour. Keeping names for the people you are friendly with is okay but using slangs in generic terms is really not acceptable.

Like for example very common one is “Chinky” that refers to mostly people with Chinese origin. Same way “Nigger” is the word used for black people mostly in USA. And the most offensive term I hate personally is “Katua” or “Mullah” to describe people of Muslim origin. And what is amazing is that people find pride and fun while calling these names out. I never liked, when I use to work and when my seniors use to joke about taking these slangs, I use to keep quiet, no point in correcting these so called high profile, sophisticated, intellectual and elite class. They know everything and if you correct them you are either spoiled sport or trying to be classy and modest.

So I stopped correcting anyone now. But I feel we should not be using derogatory term for anyone and just for once try to step in their shoes, how will you feel if someone does that to you.

Have a lovely and joyous day.

Love

Tripts🥰

The Intern

When I started working in Mumbai in T.V industry, I used to be embarrassed quite a while because everyone out there were so young to me, even my creative directors and I was working as their juniors, all because I started too late.

But then one day while net surfing I came across this wonderful movie that changed my mindset all together. Well, even if you are working with your younger ones as your seniors, there is no need to be embarrassed if you are dedicated, hardworking, focused and most important wearing a smile whole time at work.

At the end how does it matter what age you are till the time you know your job and love your job and even if people sometime talk about you or seem surprised for your age, that’s okay. You be confident because at the end confidence is what matters and trust me slowly people will love you.

Love

Tripts…

Saree!!!

Now a days saree has become a real taboo. If you wear saree it has to be a special occasion. Either some boys parents are coming to see you or you are going for some event or may be you are an air hostess. Whatever it is but it cannot be a regular wear like jeans, skirts or frocks.

In earlier times women use to wear saree as their daily wear. I love wearing saree. I feel comfortable and beautiful both in saree. Oh and yes not to forget you can look sexy too in saree, you don’t have to necessarily wear short dress to look sexy and hot. People should really change their mindset. And forget people talking about individuals wear what makes you happy and not give up on societal pressure. I have a good collection of saree and I wear it anytime I want even if at home sometimes and if that makes me “Behenji” as some people says who cares after all it’s your body.

Happiness always

Tripts🌸

Vegetarian or Non-Vegetarian???

I am a vegetarian by choice and not by religion. I am a Brahmin so I had to be a vegetarian is not the thing. And it should not be for any one. What has meat eating to do with your religion. It is you who has to decide whether you want to eat some other living being or not. No religion says to kill someone and eat neither does it say not to eat.

Like I find it really funny when non vegetarian’s say we don’t eat non-veg on Tuesday and Thursday. What??? Any specific god is going to get angry if you do so. Everything is in our mind. What we want and what we don’t. It should come from within. Eating vegetarian does not make someone saint and eating non-veg devil. At the end it is matter of choice.

See ya soon lovely people❤️

My Name Is Khan!

This movie is one of my favourite and I can watch it umpteen no of times. No, not because of SRK or Karan Johar. It is my favourite due to the fact I always believed and it was portrayed in the movie. Back in 2010 when this movie was released, I watched in theatre and I cried, I cried a lot. Not because I got emotional, yes ofcourse this movie was emotional but I cried out of happiness. Simply because I was happy finally someone said what I was saying whole of these years and people were arguing with me. No one agreed with me.

The point I am trying to make here is that why we bracket Muslims. Not all Muslims are terrorists, not all Muslims are bad. Yes I do agree that they are rigid religiously. If hypothetically we believe also that all Muslims are very cynical then too what you all do, outcast them, demean them, look down upon them. They have certain ways of thinking and worshiping. They behave differently but that’s okay. If you say that they don’t pray our God or enter our temples, that’s okay, but you don’t stop going to mosques. Why you have to start comparisans.

When I was doing graduation, I still remember I have a very good friend and batchmate Iftikhar with me who use to walk with me till my hostel gate every day. The dean of my university was Brahmin like me. Once the guards caught us thinking us to be couple took our I.d cards, not to miss our exams were near. The guard saw our I.d cards, looking at my name Tripathi and his name being Khan, they gave back my card and kept his, we both pleaded but he yelled and asked us to leave. He paid the price for dropping me hostel safely though we were never in love. I genuinely felt bad for him and I never saw him again after that day.

This is just one incident that happened with me, there are no of such incidents that happen with people every now and then especially when they travel abroad. Why???? Muslims are people just like us. I have read Quran and it also teaches what other religious pictures teaches us. No difference at all. Yes I agree terrorism mostly has Muslims but does that mean we should start hating overall Muslims. No!!!

Infact when Pulwama Attack happened in Feb 2019, it is so ironic that what Mr. Navjot Singh Sidhu said for which he was condemned a lot I said exactly the same a day before that, even if the attack has been done by Pakistan, to blame entire Pakistan people is wrong.

I know many people will hate me for writing this, may be they will also call me anti Indian but all I am saying is humanity is above all and using terms for Muslims like “Mullah” “Katua” etc is derogatory. Not acceptable at all. Treat Muslims with equality and pride. They are human too like us. No need to look them down upon. Yes and I do believe that not all of them are terrorists.

Love, Peace and Humanity.

Tripts.

Love…

Recently I was re watching “Nishabd”. Back in 2007 when the movie released, I was also critical of Mr.Bachchan and the movie as well. However, today I think Love is love, it does not understand any barriers, be it age, religion, caste, creed, community or even gender. There is nothing legal or moral when it comes to Love. May be that’s why it is said “Everything is fair in love”.

So what if a 70 year old man fell in love with a 20 year old girl. Even if he is married and has a 20 year old daughter. Love is a feeling, it is a beautiful emotion. When it overpowers you, it does not see anything else but only your heart. Even if you are married for 30 years, there is a possibility that your heart might beat for someone you just meet. But why is it difficult for society to accept that Love is Love beyond anyone’s restrictions and expectations.

You feel for someone strongly and express it. Why you have to criticise or abandon him or her. Your heart and soul belongs to an individual per say, no one else should have a say in it. Love should be treated with love and not with hatred and judgements. When I watched the movie, I couldn’t understand why the wife and daughter had to abandon him filled with hatred and disgust. He liked being in someone’s company. It made him happy, it should not be termed as cheating on his wife.

It is strange to see people being so judgemental about it. Guys, always be supportive of Love, irrespective of how and which form it is coming. Everyone has the right to feel it. Though I as an individual has always experienced pain in it still I would say that it is a beautiful emotion and I completely believe and support it’s sanctity.

So feel love, believe in love and embrace love.

Love

Tripts…

Blogging???

“Blogging” what is blogging? Basically it is meant to share your ideas and express your thoughts. When I started to write blogs, I was suffering with depression that too major ones so I thought of using write therapy as suggested by one of my friend. But I didn’t realised when I became the monster who started writing about people or I should say demeaning them. And the worst part was also shared it on social sites for the world to see. But I didn’t realise that this writing that is meant to bring out the best in you is bringing out the worst in me.

There were many people who got hurt but still I had this “I don’t care attitude” which refrained me from being apologetic. Anywhich ways I had been a pessimistic person since very early age and this has instilled all the more negativity in me. Well I have now realised that your blogs should be positive in nature, it should influence people motivate them to do well in life, moreover educate them in some way and also to understand oneself.

Well, the bottom line is we all are made up of mistakes and the best part is we realise it sooner or later. There shouldn’t be any room for guilt and embarrassment later. I was like this monster who was telling people how bad the world is and how great I am. But I was wrong. I am not a good writer, still learning. I would request to all just spread positivity here. We should only spread love, there is already so much hatred going on. I have learnt my lesson hard way and after loosing some beautiful people in my life, yes ofcourse big “APOLOGY” to them. But that’s okay a good human being is the one who addresses the mistakes, rectifies it and never commit the same. Yes you are allowed to do new ones though 😂

So folks, let’s spread positivity and love as much as we can.

Love and only love

Tripts

Sharing is not caring anymore!

We have grown up hearing this phrase “Sharing is caring”, in schools we use to hear this while on picnics to share our tiffin, and later it became sharing of thoughts. But as the time is changing it seems sharing is actually not caring anymore. When you share your emotional turbulences with people or most precisely your friends, they tend to use it against you or may be later trying to tell you how negative you are and how great they are to still be with you inspite of your reckless behaviour.

It is really sad and then it is termed as you being a difficult person. I don’t know whether I am depressed or not but whatever I have shared with my friends all these years have come infront of me in a very distasteful manner. I had a close friend whom I thought of being transparent infront of her as I thought I can be myself but one day on being asked about my personality, she replied that you have hell lot of emotional issues etc etc, all what I shared being troubled, was presented in a way that I am too emotional and disturbed soul who is difficult to please. Then one of my cousin said that I spoke to you because you are very lonely and no one to talk to, I have many friends you have none, making me realise that I am someone to be felt pity for and then recently one of my actor friend also said that I supported you when everyone else left you, irrespective of me being a celebrity so on and so forth.

All this makes me wonder, was all this worthy for.I shared things out of emotions, being vulnerable and what you all did, made me feel like a loser, someone who should be pittied at, someone who is not wanted, not accepted and you are doing favour at her. So now I think it was rather good if I wouldn’t have opened up about myself at all. Then why all these big big seminars do sweet talks such as share yourself and talk your heart out, when you do so you are later on mocked.

I don’t feel angry on those who came in my life just feel sad for me that I was thinking that people lisitening to me are really my friends and my emotions are worth for giving a ear.

Have a nice day with happy thoughts and genuine people around❤️

Why being judgemental ???

Being judgemental is the biggest disease of our country. I believe almost everyone here is judgemental, you will rarely find a “Species” who is not judgemental and who takes people and situations the way it is. I am also not away of this disease however have made lot of improvement in this area and hence am able to write a blog on this. Earlier I use to be hell lot of judgemental about everyone, but as they say na Karma is above all, I was hit so hard by Karma that I understood the effect it has on others so now I have stopped being judgmental though I am judged a lot.

So what if someone is not married at the age of 40, so what if someone is still virgin at the age of 40, so what if someone does not have interest in politics or is not updated of current affairs, so what if someone is not having babies after being married for 10 years, so what if someone is having only girl children and no boys, so what if someone at the age of 40 behaves kiddish and do not show signs of maturity, so what if someone only have boys as friends and no girlfriends, so what if being a girl someone loves to smoke and drink and party, so what if someone likes to sit in the room when the party is going out and so the list goes on.

At the end we all are humans. We can have different lifestyles, different choices and different mindset which gives us happiness, who gives you authority to judge that person. Does that person harm you in any way. There are some people who are really strong headed who give a damm what people say or think about them. Good!!! But there are some people, those the weaker section of society who do gets impacted with people’s way of judgements about them. First of all you all should know that there are other things going on someone else’s life which you are not aware of so your words or actions might add up to that misery they are facing. And even if everything is cool why not leave them alone.

Like I can give example of my own family without naming the very close member of my family always judges me by the kind of posts I put on social media, or my being filmy or the set of friends I have especially boys. Sometimes I do get embarrassed by that look in her eyes. Those look are really sarcastic. I feel low, embarrassed in my own self. My point here is if you are doing something does that mean I should do the same to fit in the intellectual circuit. Why, why can’t one be him or herself without being judged. It is very easy to give someone Gyan but it is difficult to follow that yourself.

Stop judging people, welcome them with open arms and a smile on your face. It would make a difference and then this world would be even more beautiful place to live in. And please for heaven sake stop saying “Log kya kahenge” Log waise bhi kahenge, aap kuch bhi kar lein. So do what your heart truly believes in, our society is such that it will never stop judging you because it’s their birth right, they were born with this power to belittle others and question them on every single thing they do.

Well, still we shouldn’t leave a ray of hope in us.

Keep loving and spreading positivity😇

Tripts

Married? NO!!! Why??

Hmmm, big question🤪 Tough one to answer! More than an IAS question I guess. Since long I wanted to write something on this, however whenever I thought of writing I fall short of words. But today I thought of just scribbing whatever is there in my mind without thinking if my grammar is proper or my vocabulary is fabulous.

Marriage? What is marriage??? If we go by meaning it would be like something “A sacred institution where two souls compatible to each other meet” Blah Blah Blah… But in reality marriage is something that just happens when two individuals meet, and are destined to mingle into one entity. But what if there is someone who is 25 plus and not married. Now, is that a shameful act? Or is the filth and negativity in my head? I am a single individual, my friends of my age are married and some are even having kids. Now, the reasons could be many. Not necessarily depressive ones or may be. You can’t say! But my point is why this one is so relevant a question to ask a single individual, the most important one. Off lately I came across some of my old friends with whom I was not in touch since quite a long time, and guess what the first question they asked me “Hey, are you married? No, Why? To begin with, yes they all are happily married and well settled in life.

To answer let me first begin with a happy smile that NO there is no sad story but sometimes things just don’t happen. I do not have one perfect answer as to why I am still single. May be I was not suppose to marry, may be I am not the right individual that any guy would like to settle with, may be I have adjustment issues or may be it still is not the right time… May be, May be, May be… No answer! Now tell me if you meet me at some point in life and find me still single what answer should I give you.

Earlier I was not upset of not getting married. I was a strong individual but now I am getting weak, my friends who ask me why aren’t am married don’t fail to amaze me by even giving me advice to get married as it is the only BIG necessity in life. Sometimes I feel like hiding somewhere where no one knows me, but I know that is also not an option. If I was some big personality having crores in my account, may be still then some people atleast would shut themselves if not all because then I would be having loads of money to take care of and most importantly enough to shut people, but I don’t even have that much money. No am not feeling sorry for myself because not getting married was my personal choice, but looking at societal mindset I do feel sorry for my parents because even though they don’t say anything but I do know somewhere they wanted deep in their hearts how good it would be if their daughter was married like other’s.

Sometimes I wonder where is people’s compassion towards others. If I see someone not married or not having a baby, I do not ask this question because somewhere I know it would pinch them deep down, if not all may be some. But why they do not think before asking especially if they are married that their question might hurt the person the question is being directed to. People should definitely have COMPASSION towards their fellow beings, may be they generically ask and do not intend to hurt anyone but if at the age of 40 someone is not married there might be some reason which they might not want to answer and might feel embarrassed to even address this question. And then it becomes socially awkward for such people to come in public and embrace their own selves be their own true original self. And how funny it is that then you only ask “What happened, you are not you anymore”.

I know nothing will change, this will keep on going and it’s okay people of our parents age won’t change, there is whole generation which we need to cover so we can ignore but what for the people of our age, can’t they develop “Understanding”, “Love” and “Respect” for the people of their own age group. Why can’t you be accepting? This is one question that all of us needs to ask ourselves and then we might expect some positive change in society in coming times.

And remember as someone rightly said once “Singleness is not a sickness, a sin, or a problem. Single people are not broken and they do not need to be fixed”. Stop feeling pity for them and be happy with them and enjoy with them like you use to once when you were friends when you were young 😘

Am I right OR I am right😂🌸❤️

Tripts!!!