people – Page 2

Depression & Suicide…

The psychotically depressed person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of “hopelessness”… not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person… will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise… Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me… The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors.

Bit high to understand but meaning is deep hidden, if you can understand the person’s silence, you will understand this as well😇

Love

Tripts

Shame

This is what I deals with most of the times!!!

Most people who live with depression live with some sort of shame. Whether it’s shame about who you are: I am not good enough, smart enough, successful enough, pretty enough, thin enough. Shame about what depression has turned you into: I’m not productive enough, reliable enough, happy enough. Shame about being depressed at all: I’m not normal enough. Shame about not being able to control all these disturbing thoughts: I’m not enough.

Embarrassment while similar to shame is still very different. Embarrassment is situational and occurs when the image you want to project to the world takes a hit and there are spectators.

Shame and guilt are not same either. Guilt can often be a positive emotion that helps you after your behaviour- if you believe you have behaved badly and it pushes you to behave more morally in future. Guilt is all about making amends while shame is about isolating, hiding and escaping.

Essentially shame causes you psychological pain so that you can see mistakes that you’re making and correct yourself.

Certainly most people dealing with mood or anxiety disorders seem to have an overdeveloped ability to feel shame.

Love

Tripts❤️

Saree!!!

Now a days saree has become a real taboo. If you wear saree it has to be a special occasion. Either some boys parents are coming to see you or you are going for some event or may be you are an air hostess. Whatever it is but it cannot be a regular wear like jeans, skirts or frocks.

In earlier times women use to wear saree as their daily wear. I love wearing saree. I feel comfortable and beautiful both in saree. Oh and yes not to forget you can look sexy too in saree, you don’t have to necessarily wear short dress to look sexy and hot. People should really change their mindset. And forget people talking about individuals wear what makes you happy and not give up on societal pressure. I have a good collection of saree and I wear it anytime I want even if at home sometimes and if that makes me “Behenji” as some people says who cares after all it’s your body.

Happiness always

Tripts🌸

Awards???

Now a days, Awards has become a big joke. Gone are the days when awards were given on the basis of sheer talent. But today all you need to be in the good books. Maintain relationships, be fairly nice to the award community basically be a yes man and the award is yours.

Initially when Amir Khan banned Filmfare awards I found it bit funny, I thought so big deal, it happens everywhere, he should take light. But now even National Awards has lost its credibility. It has more or less become the present government ruled awards. Well, I do not disagree with the talent of those who recieve the award, however I do feel the more deserving candidate does not receive the awards. Like, back in 90’s I still do not understand how come Meenakshi Sheshasri did not recieve award for much acclaimed “Damini” and Amir Khan for “Rangeela”. And the list is long.

I remember in 1 of the interview Kangana said “If I don’t recieve award for “Manikarnika”, National Awards credibility would be questioned and here you go she gets the award, however nonetheless she is talented and brilliant actress but not for national award, she got national award only because she is Headhearted BJP supporter. Not only Kangana when Akshay got National award for Rustom instead of Amir for Dangal it was quite disheartening.

Filmfare has anywhich ways lost its credibility way back but now National Awards has lost its credibility too, for what these awards are given Talent NO. So why this drama. Now even the most prestigious awards like Padam Shree is under Radar. For what kind of contribution Ekta Kapoor was given. Deserving people will never ever get the much acclaimed awards.

Anyways, this circus is never ending and will go on. No matter how talented you are, if you are the one who knows how to keep the “Power” happy, then it’s yours.

Love

Tripts

My Name Is Khan!

This movie is one of my favourite and I can watch it umpteen no of times. No, not because of SRK or Karan Johar. It is my favourite due to the fact I always believed and it was portrayed in the movie. Back in 2010 when this movie was released, I watched in theatre and I cried, I cried a lot. Not because I got emotional, yes ofcourse this movie was emotional but I cried out of happiness. Simply because I was happy finally someone said what I was saying whole of these years and people were arguing with me. No one agreed with me.

The point I am trying to make here is that why we bracket Muslims. Not all Muslims are terrorists, not all Muslims are bad. Yes I do agree that they are rigid religiously. If hypothetically we believe also that all Muslims are very cynical then too what you all do, outcast them, demean them, look down upon them. They have certain ways of thinking and worshiping. They behave differently but that’s okay. If you say that they don’t pray our God or enter our temples, that’s okay, but you don’t stop going to mosques. Why you have to start comparisans.

When I was doing graduation, I still remember I have a very good friend and batchmate Iftikhar with me who use to walk with me till my hostel gate every day. The dean of my university was Brahmin like me. Once the guards caught us thinking us to be couple took our I.d cards, not to miss our exams were near. The guard saw our I.d cards, looking at my name Tripathi and his name being Khan, they gave back my card and kept his, we both pleaded but he yelled and asked us to leave. He paid the price for dropping me hostel safely though we were never in love. I genuinely felt bad for him and I never saw him again after that day.

This is just one incident that happened with me, there are no of such incidents that happen with people every now and then especially when they travel abroad. Why???? Muslims are people just like us. I have read Quran and it also teaches what other religious pictures teaches us. No difference at all. Yes I agree terrorism mostly has Muslims but does that mean we should start hating overall Muslims. No!!!

Infact when Pulwama Attack happened in Feb 2019, it is so ironic that what Mr. Navjot Singh Sidhu said for which he was condemned a lot I said exactly the same a day before that, even if the attack has been done by Pakistan, to blame entire Pakistan people is wrong.

I know many people will hate me for writing this, may be they will also call me anti Indian but all I am saying is humanity is above all and using terms for Muslims like “Mullah” “Katua” etc is derogatory. Not acceptable at all. Treat Muslims with equality and pride. They are human too like us. No need to look them down upon. Yes and I do believe that not all of them are terrorists.

Love, Peace and Humanity.

Tripts.

Mental illness – Certified Madness

“Depression” what is it. What kind of illness is it? Is it a term used in English language, a disease or a myth. Over sometime I have realised that when someone is diagnosed with a disease called depression, that person is certified wrongdoer, means if something happens, and the person tries to put his or her side, it is always termed as “Oh that one is depressed, have mood swings etc etc, she or he needs therapy, that means she can never be right, why because she is depressed.

A person who goes through mental illness has the capability of thinking and understanding. She may have her versions to tell. She should be heard, acknowledged too. If someone commit suicide there also very easily it is blamed on the depression, that he/she was depressed and then comes all the fancy terms like “Bipolar Disorder” “Clinical Depression” “Schizophrenia” etc etc. For people you are suffering from mental illness that means whatever you say or believe is all in your mind, your imagination. You can never be right. There is overdeveloped sympathy for you. You are certified “Bechari” for everyone. You can no longer be a strong independent individual because you are suffering from some kind of mental illness.

It is so funny that first these people tell you that you are mentally ill then introduce you to some psychiatrist and then never let you live a normal life. Your whole life you are dependent on medicines and counsellors. If ever you try to talk about something that is not right, you are asked “Have you stopped taking your medicines”. In your head you have already accepted that this person is MAD, but you will not say it because you are an intellectual part of this society.

I would like to sum up here by saying that yes depression does exist, there are some forms of mental illness that do exist. But at the same time the depression survivors have brain to think, they can be intellectuals too. They can be right in lot many things. All you need is to be a compassionate lisiteners, where a person can lighten there hearts and all the baggage they have. Also treat them as normal human beings. Just because they are depressed does not mean, they don’t have right to feel bad, hurt and raise their voice and if they in worst case commit suicide, we should not assume that they were depressed so died and close the matter. They can be abused, threatened or going through certain situations in life which is not right.

Remember “Depression” is a illness that is weakness and sadness hidden in heart. It has nothing to do with your mind, that can very well think and rationalise.

Love

Tripts

Love…

Recently I was re watching “Nishabd”. Back in 2007 when the movie released, I was also critical of Mr.Bachchan and the movie as well. However, today I think Love is love, it does not understand any barriers, be it age, religion, caste, creed, community or even gender. There is nothing legal or moral when it comes to Love. May be that’s why it is said “Everything is fair in love”.

So what if a 70 year old man fell in love with a 20 year old girl. Even if he is married and has a 20 year old daughter. Love is a feeling, it is a beautiful emotion. When it overpowers you, it does not see anything else but only your heart. Even if you are married for 30 years, there is a possibility that your heart might beat for someone you just meet. But why is it difficult for society to accept that Love is Love beyond anyone’s restrictions and expectations.

You feel for someone strongly and express it. Why you have to criticise or abandon him or her. Your heart and soul belongs to an individual per say, no one else should have a say in it. Love should be treated with love and not with hatred and judgements. When I watched the movie, I couldn’t understand why the wife and daughter had to abandon him filled with hatred and disgust. He liked being in someone’s company. It made him happy, it should not be termed as cheating on his wife.

It is strange to see people being so judgemental about it. Guys, always be supportive of Love, irrespective of how and which form it is coming. Everyone has the right to feel it. Though I as an individual has always experienced pain in it still I would say that it is a beautiful emotion and I completely believe and support it’s sanctity.

So feel love, believe in love and embrace love.

Love

Tripts…

Loneliness & its mental health impact

Loneliness is a subjective feeling that people are not with you, people don’t understand you, you don’t feel connected, you feel alone. And what’s interesting is loneliness is different from social isolation. It is really ironic that someone can have wide network of people around them and still feel lonely. And that is majorly my problem as well. Being surrounded with people I always feel lonely. So that means lonelyness and social isolation are 2 different things. And I fall in 2nd category.

So let’s talk about people who are socially connected still lonely. So first of all we need to understand what is the quality of interaction we have if we say we are socially connected and a lot of people will say that we are mostly connected socially online a lot these days, that means the social connectivity that we feel is not in real life, then secondly when you are connecting with people are you making yourself vulnerable. Because in reality online everyone portray the perfect life, no one displays the imperfections so first of all you have to decide are you willing to do that and as a result the person you are doing this is willing to receive this. Here I would like to state a beautiful quote “Compassionate listening is giving permission to the other person to empty their heart.” – Thich Nhat Hanh.

And now so how do we become Compassionate listeners? Compassion is empathy in action and empathy is gateway to compassion. Listening is very important without judgement, without imposing your point of view. That means we need to be that someone who can listen and give you the space to unload yourself. And trust me being a compassionate listener is a Privilige, a quality that most of us are lacking today.

Sharing is not caring anymore!

We have grown up hearing this phrase “Sharing is caring”, in schools we use to hear this while on picnics to share our tiffin, and later it became sharing of thoughts. But as the time is changing it seems sharing is actually not caring anymore. When you share your emotional turbulences with people or most precisely your friends, they tend to use it against you or may be later trying to tell you how negative you are and how great they are to still be with you inspite of your reckless behaviour.

It is really sad and then it is termed as you being a difficult person. I don’t know whether I am depressed or not but whatever I have shared with my friends all these years have come infront of me in a very distasteful manner. I had a close friend whom I thought of being transparent infront of her as I thought I can be myself but one day on being asked about my personality, she replied that you have hell lot of emotional issues etc etc, all what I shared being troubled, was presented in a way that I am too emotional and disturbed soul who is difficult to please. Then one of my cousin said that I spoke to you because you are very lonely and no one to talk to, I have many friends you have none, making me realise that I am someone to be felt pity for and then recently one of my actor friend also said that I supported you when everyone else left you, irrespective of me being a celebrity so on and so forth.

All this makes me wonder, was all this worthy for.I shared things out of emotions, being vulnerable and what you all did, made me feel like a loser, someone who should be pittied at, someone who is not wanted, not accepted and you are doing favour at her. So now I think it was rather good if I wouldn’t have opened up about myself at all. Then why all these big big seminars do sweet talks such as share yourself and talk your heart out, when you do so you are later on mocked.

I don’t feel angry on those who came in my life just feel sad for me that I was thinking that people lisitening to me are really my friends and my emotions are worth for giving a ear.

Have a nice day with happy thoughts and genuine people around❤️

Trust

Let’s begin with what is Trust. It is a belief that someone is good, honest and sincere. Why I chose to write on this topic is because I have been a victim of trust since long. I trust people easily and that has been my biggest problem. I am not a shrewd, street smart person who can use opportunity to her benefit. No offence to anyone but may be the world functions this way and I am a misfit in here. And specially after SSR death case I have lost respect for everyone. Infact I use to be Arnab’s fan but recently with the chain of events I saw that everyone is settling their scores no one is genuine, no one is wanting to give justice to Sushant they are just working to satisfy their political vendetta. So I was least bothered when he was arrested all I cared was that a genuine soul is no more between us. This is a brutal world we are living in.

So coming back to trust, when someone mails me “Tripti I will always be at your side” or they message me “You are my soul sister, I Love you” I start trusting these people that I have genuine friends but the fact is these words are just words which ideally people don’t intend to follow in their actions. I have started writing blogs since last 1 year when I was in USA and was diagnosed with depression and so I started writing those things that bother me instead of telling that person as a part of my therapy. It somehow relieves me because I am a kind of person who cannot fight.

You know I can’t be fake and am not fake at all. These blogs are my way of venting out my frustration and depression.

Last but not the least remember this in life “Breaking someone’s trust is like crumpling up a perfect piece of paper, you can smooth it over but it’s never gonna be same again.

Love and Light.

Why being judgemental ???

Being judgemental is the biggest disease of our country. I believe almost everyone here is judgemental, you will rarely find a “Species” who is not judgemental and who takes people and situations the way it is. I am also not away of this disease however have made lot of improvement in this area and hence am able to write a blog on this. Earlier I use to be hell lot of judgemental about everyone, but as they say na Karma is above all, I was hit so hard by Karma that I understood the effect it has on others so now I have stopped being judgmental though I am judged a lot.

So what if someone is not married at the age of 40, so what if someone is still virgin at the age of 40, so what if someone does not have interest in politics or is not updated of current affairs, so what if someone is not having babies after being married for 10 years, so what if someone is having only girl children and no boys, so what if someone at the age of 40 behaves kiddish and do not show signs of maturity, so what if someone only have boys as friends and no girlfriends, so what if being a girl someone loves to smoke and drink and party, so what if someone likes to sit in the room when the party is going out and so the list goes on.

At the end we all are humans. We can have different lifestyles, different choices and different mindset which gives us happiness, who gives you authority to judge that person. Does that person harm you in any way. There are some people who are really strong headed who give a damm what people say or think about them. Good!!! But there are some people, those the weaker section of society who do gets impacted with people’s way of judgements about them. First of all you all should know that there are other things going on someone else’s life which you are not aware of so your words or actions might add up to that misery they are facing. And even if everything is cool why not leave them alone.

Like I can give example of my own family without naming the very close member of my family always judges me by the kind of posts I put on social media, or my being filmy or the set of friends I have especially boys. Sometimes I do get embarrassed by that look in her eyes. Those look are really sarcastic. I feel low, embarrassed in my own self. My point here is if you are doing something does that mean I should do the same to fit in the intellectual circuit. Why, why can’t one be him or herself without being judged. It is very easy to give someone Gyan but it is difficult to follow that yourself.

Stop judging people, welcome them with open arms and a smile on your face. It would make a difference and then this world would be even more beautiful place to live in. And please for heaven sake stop saying “Log kya kahenge” Log waise bhi kahenge, aap kuch bhi kar lein. So do what your heart truly believes in, our society is such that it will never stop judging you because it’s their birth right, they were born with this power to belittle others and question them on every single thing they do.

Well, still we shouldn’t leave a ray of hope in us.

Keep loving and spreading positivity😇

Tripts

Compassion

Word is enough to describe its whole identity in the world. In todays’s age what we are lacking is compassion towards others. I am not going out, if you look in your own family, your own family will not be compassionate towards you. It is very easy for people to turn their back and say that your behaviour is not nice and we are finding difficult to adjust with you. But they will never try to understand what a weak mind is thinking and why it is behaving in a reckless manner.

There is absolutely no justification for ill mannerisms and misbehaviour but there is certainly a reason behind it. If you see someone not behaving normal, do you cut off and zoned out with that person or try to understand if you can help that person, or to make them understand in the harsh manner possible do something which can leave permanent scar on their fragile mind. I know what ever I am scribbing here right now is not making sense to anyone here reading this but I can say if only people will feel how bad a person might feel due to their actions, there would be less suffering and pain in this world. Problem is that in today’s time people do not feel other people’s pain and they don’t think once before acting that their behaviour might cause immense pain to their loved ones. And I am amazed to see that once someone really close to your heart can crush your heart with equal ease and do not regret later.

Am I the only one who thinks about others, who feels others pain. It pains me somewhere to see that your pain and suffering becomes someone else’s enjoyment. Can we all not develop little bit of compassion towards each other. Are we really human because when god created a line of differentiation between animal and human he kept certain qualities only for human and Compassion is one of them. But all of us is loosing the love, respect and compassion for each other and going self centred a lot.

Love and only Love

Tripts

Married? NO!!! Why??

Hmmm, big question🤪 Tough one to answer! More than an IAS question I guess. Since long I wanted to write something on this, however whenever I thought of writing I fall short of words. But today I thought of just scribbing whatever is there in my mind without thinking if my grammar is proper or my vocabulary is fabulous.

Marriage? What is marriage??? If we go by meaning it would be like something “A sacred institution where two souls compatible to each other meet” Blah Blah Blah… But in reality marriage is something that just happens when two individuals meet, and are destined to mingle into one entity. But what if there is someone who is 25 plus and not married. Now, is that a shameful act? Or is the filth and negativity in my head? I am a single individual, my friends of my age are married and some are even having kids. Now, the reasons could be many. Not necessarily depressive ones or may be. You can’t say! But my point is why this one is so relevant a question to ask a single individual, the most important one. Off lately I came across some of my old friends with whom I was not in touch since quite a long time, and guess what the first question they asked me “Hey, are you married? No, Why? To begin with, yes they all are happily married and well settled in life.

To answer let me first begin with a happy smile that NO there is no sad story but sometimes things just don’t happen. I do not have one perfect answer as to why I am still single. May be I was not suppose to marry, may be I am not the right individual that any guy would like to settle with, may be I have adjustment issues or may be it still is not the right time… May be, May be, May be… No answer! Now tell me if you meet me at some point in life and find me still single what answer should I give you.

Earlier I was not upset of not getting married. I was a strong individual but now I am getting weak, my friends who ask me why aren’t am married don’t fail to amaze me by even giving me advice to get married as it is the only BIG necessity in life. Sometimes I feel like hiding somewhere where no one knows me, but I know that is also not an option. If I was some big personality having crores in my account, may be still then some people atleast would shut themselves if not all because then I would be having loads of money to take care of and most importantly enough to shut people, but I don’t even have that much money. No am not feeling sorry for myself because not getting married was my personal choice, but looking at societal mindset I do feel sorry for my parents because even though they don’t say anything but I do know somewhere they wanted deep in their hearts how good it would be if their daughter was married like other’s.

Sometimes I wonder where is people’s compassion towards others. If I see someone not married or not having a baby, I do not ask this question because somewhere I know it would pinch them deep down, if not all may be some. But why they do not think before asking especially if they are married that their question might hurt the person the question is being directed to. People should definitely have COMPASSION towards their fellow beings, may be they generically ask and do not intend to hurt anyone but if at the age of 40 someone is not married there might be some reason which they might not want to answer and might feel embarrassed to even address this question. And then it becomes socially awkward for such people to come in public and embrace their own selves be their own true original self. And how funny it is that then you only ask “What happened, you are not you anymore”.

I know nothing will change, this will keep on going and it’s okay people of our parents age won’t change, there is whole generation which we need to cover so we can ignore but what for the people of our age, can’t they develop “Understanding”, “Love” and “Respect” for the people of their own age group. Why can’t you be accepting? This is one question that all of us needs to ask ourselves and then we might expect some positive change in society in coming times.

And remember as someone rightly said once “Singleness is not a sickness, a sin, or a problem. Single people are not broken and they do not need to be fixed”. Stop feeling pity for them and be happy with them and enjoy with them like you use to once when you were friends when you were young 😘

Am I right OR I am right😂🌸❤️

Tripts!!!

Happy Independence Day????

One must be wondering why question mark, well this is a question we should ask to ourselves, are we really independent? Or just like a tradition since 1947 we are celebrating it without really realising the meaning.

Yes, our country did got freedom on 15th August, 1947 from Britishers, but if you really ask me we were really better off in the rule of britishers. People might call me anti patriotic now, but that’s fine. If calling out names to each other in the name of religion, if raping a minor and getting away with it just because you are some high class Brahmin or priest, if murdering a poor woman’s son just because he married a rich bureaucrat daughter and getting away with it, all this is nationalism for you then am happy that I am anti national.

We need to be independent in our thoughts, in our actions, and then if we wish someone Happy Independence Day, it would seem more genuine and from heart. Today looking the state of law and order in our country, the way our politicians behave, our country seems more dependent then ever before. Where is the independence? Women in our country is not safe. Poor labourers sleeping on pavement is run over by four wheeler by some A grade actor and getting away with it, and giving the feeling that these labourers life has no value, is what we call independence, then I so wish I was born in britishers rule. There is still time for all of us to really get independence in true sense, wait for the time to come and then we all can say Happy Independence Day🌸

Love you all my independent peeps ❤️

Tripts

Sushant Singh Rajput – Death Of Humanity

Today while writing I cannot stop crying. Words have died, I really have to check google for a different vocabulary. What is wrong with me, why can’t I stop myself from thinking about him, he was not my favourite actor, but a talented persona, yes I will agree. When he transformed himself from television actor to film actor, I always use to think that number of T.V actors try their luck in films but none gets success as much as Sushant has achieved, and they all should learn from him, how to actually proceed in right direction.

I do not know what is right and what is wrong. Just going by the stories I am hearing, I am even no one to judge anyone or pass any judgement as now people are talking about movie mafia, nepotism etc.etc. But one thing for sure I know that humanity has died. Why people cannot see other person growing. If he was an outsider, and was trying to make his mark in this film fraternity, who gave the right to the so called elite class of our society to bully him in their own way. Why cannot he do movies and yet get the distributors. Anyways these are all nitty gritty of film industry where I do not want to go because as a matter of fact I do not know the details. But when Karan Johar tweets about his death, Alia Bhatt talks about his sudden demise, it seems we have come to the point where sensitivity is dead inside us and all what matters is being fake. Why can’t a person outside the industry be welcomed with a big hug and huge smile. Why you have to find ways anyhow to stop him/her from working ahead. It is not about Sushant committing suicide. Even if he is not dead and is with us, still the fact remains the same. Why this hatred amongst us. Someone is doing good in life, great, motivate the person. Even encourage and if you are at some prestigious position try to help the person. What will happen if you will be friendly to the person or meet him/her on some occasions. Why you have to team up against the person. I really want someone to please help me with the definition of “Humanity”. What does it actually mean.

While writing all this I remember what my brother used to tell me on many occasions “Tripti stop feeling pity on others, it will do no good to you” And yes he was right, he wanted my betterment, but being sensitive towards other being is not Pity and I do not pity Sushant but all I can see is death of humanity. People are becoming heartless, more and more money and not even less I would say zero emotions in them. What is the use of this money. In bollywood there are big banners, their fathers struggled, made money and now their sons are keeping their names and banners alive but on what stake. You are ruthless, heartless, emotionless and even humanless I would say. And to top it you have the guts of posting fake condolence messages. I mean why, it’s fine someone died, you didn’t murdered the person, he died because he could’t bear the drama, but why you have to show the concern to the world, just to establish that you are a wonderful human being, But I suppose your films will still make money, your banner will still be on top, newcomers will still want to be associated with your banner, so it hardly affects you or your name so stop being fake. You were not with the person when he was alive, now anyways it is just a body so why posting sweet messages? For us???

I have been a big time movie lover and will continue to watch movies may be of Alia Bhatt, Karan Johar and Yash Raj too but for me now they are just some robots who try to serve entertainment to us that is it. I wish and pray in coming times there should not be any more Sushant.

Love and only Love People 🙂